I think we should urban dictionary "drive of shame." It involves a sprint to your car in his underwear and shirt, surreptitiously trying to put on your bra on at stoplights without attracting attention from neighboring cars, and lurking in your car a block from home so you can know when your roommate leaves for work.
i wanted to be an indian when i was a child. apparently you cannot grow up to be an indian.
Weve literally been going out drinking five days a week. That counts as a full time job right?
There was probably a tattoo above her soulless vagina that read 'it's a trap!' Yet you ignored it
I cannot even describe to you the most amazing ass I have ever had the pleasure of seeing walk up the stairs in front of me just now.
you haven't really lived until you are in a situation where your vagina is hanging out
My night can be summed up in 3 words: Vodka. Threesomes. Hospital.
I told him to come over when I realized that I did have time for a quick booty call before church.
Just put on slippers before underwear so you know where my priorities are
Are ropes allowed in during conjugals?
I'm drunk listening and crying to Selena. How's your Monday?
answer honestly do you think i can make a bloody mary with ketchup????
Honestly his girlfriend says she hates me cause she thinks im trying to get him to cheat on her with me...she should hate me cause i already accomplished that.
Ugh hungover at a laundromat is a terrible feeling. For some reason I keep getting sucked into staring at the clothes spinning around and around and it makes me want to profusely projectile vomit everywhere
I don't actually like you. I just want to hook up with you.
I'm fine with that
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