That was a long time ago. She needed the money.
she really just asked how mermaids reproduce.
I just realized that I'm gonna have to lower my standards if I want random head.
Out of beer. Salsa pong. Never again.
Yeah I don't remember why I went to the hospital though but I just called and they have my wallet
I couldn't find my shirt this morning so I stole one from his eight year old sister. Slutted up my outfit quite a bit.
I'm going to take a nap so I don't feel like a stripper sneezed in my mouth tomorrow morning at work.
At 12:16 am. We just got out of the truck and went behind it and fucked. With 3 people in the truck. On the side of the road. As cars drove by.
ALMOST WRECKED MY SCOOTER. DAVE FRANCO HAS A TWIN AMD HE GOES HERE
i projectile vomited shoeless at 7:30 a.m. in a taco bell parking lot. never again.
Reasonably certain my seventh grade teacher is encouraging me to drop acid on twitter
They are going to name an STD after you.
And I wasn't CONVICTED of a felony, I just committed one
I can't give advice right now, I have a yeast infection.
I could have been on my second lucrative divorce by now, but nooooo, I had to be a strong independent woman.
Randomize
