Did Neil Armstrong say the moon was too far away! NO! He built himself a fucking rocketship is what he did!
question: masturbation: how much is too much? I think i'm about to tip toe a fine line
i was concerned by what you said you would do for a snickers. It wasn't even a Klondike bar.
I'm surrounded by too many unhungover people.
Hey man thanks for carrying me in and out of that frat house. There's no I in team.
When I left you were in the shower in your socks throwing up screaming it was blood but it was "ok" cuz it's recyclable. By the way it was kool aid.
She said you told her you were ready to be a dad. We just got back from our purchase of the morning after pill. That took me 2 hours of convincing. No more fucking my sister.
1. Thanks. 2. No.
I'm just gonna go with where the wind takes me. if it takes me to his dick, so be it.
This is gonna be a long day for my vagina and I
Do you have pictures of my pancakes
I need to show the world
They are the pancake equivalent of eventual wife
Youre having a picnic
Yeah but all we have is vodka, so it's getting a bit out of hand.
Sorry about the Christmas balls dude. At the time I thought they were festive as fk but I see now I've just spent too much time on the internet
It's only funny because he thinks you had sex with him to rob him.
Hey mike is locked out, sleeping on the common room couch, no idea where his pants are nor does he know where he is. When you get this let him in? And let me know ur alive too!
it’s about to be september and all i keep thinking is what if i go (another) full calendar year without having sex?
Randomize
