I was at the bar last night dancing, puking in a trash can, and ordering another drink all at the same time. Have I lost my dignity?
haha no as long as you did hook up with anybody after that.
... oops
McDonalds has hash browns for only a quarter!....how many u want?
All of them
All my problems are solved. I just got McDonalds and scratch off lottery tickets.
I hope that the reason I've been psycho on him is that I'm pregnant and not just psycho.
Call me immediately, my only recent boy news involves me biting a dick.
Just found out my mom's voicemail password is 6969..
I'm gagging in the liquor aisle just thinking about how much alcohol I'll be drinking this weekend.
You told me that you only walk into walls because it makes the room stop spinning.
how do you feel about lunch break shots ?
Woke up on the stairs at my parents house. Good start to vacation.
there is a guy passed out on top of me and i don't know what to do. help if you're awake? was anyone anyone expecting someone? maybe he found the wrong room?
Everything is just really out of control. I hear puking from three different parts of the house. Roger has black eye from being punched. Kaiser tried shaving his head, but somehow burned himself. Music is bumping, but everyone is either puking and calling out for help or blacked the fuck out.
He started to lick a stick of butter and was calling it Jennifer.
so in other words, they broke and fell off and I ate a gummy life saver off of his balls
I need my comforter. Pls bring it to me and drape me in it like an animal pelt. Ps I'm naked.
Randomize