Eating a girl out that was just in the ocean does not make her taste like saltwater taffy
found some acid from a couple months ago while looking through christmas lights. Looks like santa came early this year.
Why did that cocktail waitress get to sleep with Tiger for 2 years, and all I ever got for living in Whorelando for five years is a couple of pictures with Joey Fatone
heading to class now, facing the weekend consquences
chinese tourists just took a picture of me....im pretty sure i heard the bus drive say something about shame.
Just to give you a heads up, I am going home with your ex-boyfriend.... You can't be mad because he was my ex-boyfriend first
how bad is she
captain morgan with tits
I think I just ate eggs off of a plate covered in cocaine.
I was just too high to be in rapids man. I just screamed for the entire time I was jostling about.
The $10 cab ride turned into a $60 cab ride when you puked down the back of his seat trying to whisper in his ear. He was a trooper though, he came into to wash off in the sink and still tried to get your number.
My landlord showed my apartment to a prospective tenant today and I had my vibrator and gun both chilling on my nightstand
You were running around waving the flier in everyone's face and thats how we ended up in a church eating free breakfast tacos at 3 am
Would it be irresponsible to use my tax refund for a boob job?
Yes. Highly encouraged though.
What type of bandaid should I use on my clit
You know that episode of Spongebob where Patrick teaches Spongebob to be fancy? His dick was like that, only fancier.
Randomize
