Girls gone wild is like the hills, except sexy and it doesnt suck
this is two weekends in a row I've been the pantsless girl at the party. I love my social life.
something must definitely be wrong with me if i'm chasing after a guy who cant even get it up
after he handcuffed me and put me in the back seat, "Mrs. Officer" started playing, I thought maybe this could be my escape
I fucked him in a hamburger. literally. he has a hamburger bed.
You have to come over we all bought drinking hats. Mine has a turtle on it. Side note: somehow someone got their hands on 50 candied apples and we need to eat them...
he came in the shower with me...i thought it was going to be nice and romantic...until he started peeing on my leg.
It'll just be like "PENIS HERE". In case you get lost.
She's going to hate me
Yeah well one of her many personalities always hates you.
The rest will just start to agree
Hey you're my best friend, I'm sorry I picked my vagina over my heart last night.
Hey! you should come over!
Who is this? The number is saved as "Sexy Awesome"
thought i saw a dude in a kilt yesterday, but then i realized he was doing a walk of shame. happy st. paddy's day.
If I take a couple more shots I won't even know he's a Mormon that drives a motorcycle
They made Game of Thrones Oreos. Kill me.
hey i'm sure you are probably asleep bc you suck and think sleep is necessary to live or something?
Randomize
