This is some kinda fucked up sordid doggy brothel peepshow bullshit.
you just stared at your feet and said some shit about the molecules dancing and how you had just solved physics.
the level of his annoyance + every insult he makes = the closer I am to telling him im fucking his ex
Yeah he doesn't get it. We had to change the subject to Keanu reeves before someone got hurt.
We're playing fucking games. GAMES. THIS IS BULL SHIT. IM GOING TO THROW UP ON THE BABIES AND LEAVE.
My feelings are currently in a sea of vodka and "I don't give a shit"
Aren't they always?
Shirtless guy staggering down the sidewalk, puking into a Prada shopping bag. Ahhh, the walk of shame in Boystown.
Cutting up lines with the edge of my birth control packet. Just reminding you this is the person you've CHOSEN to be monogamous with.
Dude you spoke to a girl about CRICKET. She MUST want sex
We celebrated our relationship by shotgunning beers on his lawn in our underwear. I may have to marry this man...
My liver needs me to go back to work asap.
this is a save-me-from-tijuana-tequila-and-hoookers booty call. if i don't hear from you by 8pm i'm grabbing my passport
if i'm not back tomorrow call the embassy
He called me kiddo. We can't have sex
how drunk are you?
Several
Accent: check. Hot body: check. 8" dick: check. Feeds me biscuits in bed after rampant sex: check. Should I continue with my "Why I'm not coming back to the States" List?
Randomize
