That arnold schwarzeneger picture looks strikingly similar to paul
Not half as good looking as paul
I'd say paul has bigger bicep peaks, but who am I to judge
we screwed to my bar mtzvah tape, I became a man while watching myself becom a man
quitting drinking is the number 5 new years resolution but number 4 is enjoying life more which one do you think im going to pick
You know you hit rock bottom when you make out with a guy named after a cereal.
He brought me bullshit flowers and a bullshit apology. Even shrek did more than that for Fiona. And he's an ogre. Does this not say anything about him?
Totally sleeping on a bloodstained mattress tonight. I love life's little adventures.
He peed in the bird bath. Those birds are gonna be pissed
I'm sorry, but the "Hobbit Slam" has to be a sex move.
Nothing like grinding all night with a hot ethnic guy dressed as a clown to help conquer your phobia. Halloween is fucked up.
Liz is crying about burritos again.
Its like he woke the dragon, and the dragon is hungry for a good dick.
I don't know how Dave is alive, I feel like he's been drinking since I met him.
I'm not sure. But he has a pet sugar glider. So, points either way
As long as that's not his name for his dick.
Why do pants feel so unnatural once you enter your own house
I just found a live peacock hanging out behind the bar. I coerced it into my car and now I have a peacock bro that lives with me.
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