she has a miserable personality but its a good think you dont have sex with that
pussy has no personality
Amen to that
some dude is getting blown right outside the bar in his car. reeediculous
class
he's dribbling her head like he's fucking allen iverson
Well he's not a stripper, so we're already doing better than my last date.
When she talks to me all I hear are 5 generations of inbreeding speaking.
Also, the wait staff kept prematurely clearing my Manhattans. Not sure if it was an oversight or a hint.
He told the cop he was underage, handed the cop his ID, and the police report read "I then informed the suspect that he was not, in fact, underage"
And then out of the blue she sent me a youtube video mashup of cats puking to techno music
She poured a bottle of rum in the champagne fountain, did like 5 jello shots at the same time, then lit herself on fire. Twice. This is how everyone should turn 21.
i mean let's face it...the pregnant girl was really slowing us down.
After owing so much in back child support they should make vasectomy a mandatory
Nothing like a little " am I gonna shit myself " to spice up the work day
He played me Kanye.. Speaking my love language.. He got a well deserved BJ
He called out my ex's name during sex.
Alex is a pretty common unisex name.
It was the same Alex. I asked.
It’s awful. They need to open the bars. I’m now trolling grocery stores looking for dick
Good morning beautiful! Wanna steal a cat this weekend?
Randomize
