hook me up with the drugs dog keep up the good work
I think I kinda wanna bone that ginger from Harry Potter.
You literally just made my flesh crawl.
how hairy? two words: wookie tits
she needs to go suck a dildo, because she isn't worth a dick
last time i saw her she was begging the broken jukebox to play lady gaga.
so jimmy johns showed up at our party last night. our house is sponsored now. living the dream.
I feel like a squirrel prepping for the winter on dollar beer nights.
Omg this is like trying to sleep on a pile of ballsacks.
It's an open bar. I'm gonna be gone when you get here.
Text me the address now before you're too drunk to text English.
I just saw my 7th grade teacher at the club. We had a pretty good talk over drinks. Turns out we both like dancing on tables.
I am stoned at Disneyland with my little brother. It's gonna be a good day.
Specially since he wanted to forget that we even touched, which makes it funnier because I don't think you can take back licking someone's butthole...
It is not a successful senior year unless you show up to campus without pants at least once, right?
he called me ma'am when we were fucking last night...he's five years older than me. I think I'm in love.
How did delivering mac n cheese to my drug dealer become a two hour outing?
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