please tell me you remember why "7 days" is written above my bed in red marker
2nd semester senior, always drunk. at this point if i don't get a good parking spot, i turn around and drive home
There needs to be waaaay more alcohol in my apartment if I am going to survive being unemployed
apparently "preggers as fuck" isn't an appropriate way to describe someone...
Two words that describe last night: naked and backflips.
I'm actually not sure I need to run today, between the crazy monkey sex and breaking into my own house.
I told her I wanted to use him as a chew toy while simultaneously licking his face.
Did she tell him? And if so, was he cool with it? If yes, date him, date the fuck outta him.
Then. Omg he showed me A CARD TRICK AFTER WE CAME
You know, we cock-blocked like 5 people last night. It's like we're her vagina goalies
well he never texted me back and the pizza I took my rage out didn't deserve such malice
Might call you tomorrow on a drunken hate filled rant, or just a normal hate filled rant, either way be ready.
Pretty sure the waitress here is concerned about well being bc I've been here drinking by myself for 3 hours. If only I could show here FB so she'd know I'm not alone...
It isn't about the beer pong. It is about the destruction of the patriarchy.
Just had a flashback of scottish man yellin' at my face. What the fuck I did?
Just reached for my phone in my non existant pocket while it was in my hand.
Randomize
