Omg. I just woke up in a room full of naked people
new low: just stole a ciggarette from a bum sleeping on the side of the street.
ohh what kind?
At Wal-Mart last night I watched two guys scramble for $4.34 to pay for a pack of ping pong balls and red solo cups. They had to put the .34 on a credit card. Winter break begins!
We were drinking cognac with TAB. I felt like trailer park royalty.
Two man bar crawl was hectic. Just found leaves in my pocket.
Well, think of it this way, if this were 200 years ago your father would have received the most goats in all the village for your fertile loins. Think about that.
It was beyond pathetic. You yelled her name at every blonde chick we saw hoping it would be her. Then you puked your corn dog
When are you not under some influence?
Since last Tuesday...yesterday.
SOS. HE HAS PASSED OUT AND IS LYING ON TOP OF ME. HE IS STILL INSIDE. HELP
There's a drag queen here that reminds me strongly of you. You should try crossdressing.
I took "we live within stumbling distance of the bar" as an invitation and challenge
she keeps dunkaroos and gatorade in her bed. yep pretty sure im in love.
Bought a gym bag tonight. Used it to bring my Taco Bell in the house.
i need something from you. video yourself doing naked jumping jacks and send it to me. it will make me smile
That ass isn’t going to eat itself.
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