The night ended with a lot of tears and everyone singing along to Willenium
i dont feel like going...you don't know how much work goes into getting my whore on
just fucked two guys in less than 12 hours. i miss this part of being single.
and by single i mean slutty
We ended up getting arrested after we flagged down the cops for a ride home with open beers in our hands... turns out the "nobody told me" excuse doesn't cut it anymore
So I found the perfect "Yeah I gained weight since high school but it went to all the right places" outfit for the reunion this weekend.
Well the strippers have danced to goo goo dolls and green day, time of your life. Were all gonna commit suicide.
This juggling 3 dicks is getting exhausting
You flew out of the bedroom, stole two Solo cups from the beer pong table, put them on your feet, clicked your heels together three times
You and your vagina are hellbent on selfdestruction and bad decisions
Dude...can we put that on a tshirt? I will totally sport that shit.
I'll be there with bells on. And by "bells" I mean "jäger bombs". And by "on" I mean "being poured down my gullet".
I just want somewhere where I can sit down, without changing my clothes, that will serve me breakfast food and booze. Is that too much to ask?
If it exists, I've probably pregamed it.
Think I have the only job where I can be naked in a room with my manager at work. Apart from hookers
Well you could have stayed home, played house and got blow jobs all weekend babe, but we all have to live with our decision
like sometimes I wish I was allergic to latex so I wouldn't have sex with so many people..
Randomize
