That's what you get for not wearing a bra and jumping on a trampoline
we need to get ahold of those "sexting" teens on tyra. HAWT!
wasnt one 13?
And then she started grabbing onto random guys legs, asking their names, and if they wanted to be friends... Haha, I love when the girls my ex's are dating are total drunken whores.
I swear, you have an app for that. "Attention: your boyfriend is pooping. Place call?"
I know the scar will be in an obvious place, that's why I'm certain it'll score me cancer blowjobs
Woke up with his dick on the side of my face, it's like he passed out mid-mushroom stamp.
There is nothing more demoralizing than exchanging 150 dollar Christmas gifts with a girl your not sleeping with
In honor of Sarah Palin's bday I suggest we watch Nailing Palin
dude there's a blind guy on the trail using his service dog to hit on girls.
alll i remember is comming back downstairs, his pants were off and he was aplauding me
People were wondering why I started hanging out with him after high school, the simple answer is now that I don't see his dorky ness everyday I can just focus on his amazing penis.
My brother and I have had one conversation in the past like 3 weeks and it was about what it would be like as a sentient butt plug
I just walked through the door and she ran up to me, hugged me, unzipped my pants and immediately started sucking my dick. Good day.
Yeah. 11 people shoved in a clown car for a 1 hour party. I'm too old for house parties.
look im sitting on my bathroom floor in my underwear snorting cocaine can we talk about this later
Randomize
