Considering the face that your still in jail Im gunna go with no.
you think the cum will come out of moms black shirt?
Im rethinking drunk tuesdays. Also rethinking ovaries.
I shagged another guy with one ball last night. Are there really that many dudes with one nut in la or am I just a magnet for prostetic testes?
he just came in and straightened the chair and left again
Never again. Her vagina looked like a sad old man.
It's also dangerous to ride a bike down the stairs after a few beers, but I've done it.
You slept with a red coat way too close to independence day. It's just very unpatriotic.
you pulled down your pants to convince a girl you were god
He's going to let me keep his bowl in my car. Does that make us Facebook official?
I didn't know whether to laugh at the fact that a dog bit his balls or throw up cause my dad was telling me a story involving his balls.
Also, did you really start discussing the weather in the middle of telling you my sexual fantasy about you?
Are you proud of yourself?
ask me again when I'm drunk. Then fuck off.
Well, while we went through airport security, I found out Mom got her clit pierced, so there's that.
I just got out of the shower and I feel like I just washed off 10 lbs of bad decisions...
Randomize
