I want to bang chis in dee ass burt he be hating on me times two. Me be tryin ti love onu
Bendover
Jenny was looking for something soft to drink since it's only noon, she chose spiced rum. Think she might die today
Don't bang him. The amount of Jack Johnson he listens to is embarrassing for even a white person.
Wake your ass up this is a day of horror where we get horroibly drunk and sleep with tandom dudes who wish they were super heros ps i havr stuffed animals over my privates im a petting zoo this year
It would be like if I said I had the cure for cancer and my explanation was I like turtles.
You're the common denominator of my blackouts.
I'm gonna try Jim's breakup remedy this weekend.
Is that the one where you drink 3 cases of beer and rewatch as much WWE RAW as you can find? Or the one where you hookup with fatties on Craigslist?
There are two guys's cum on my sheets. Be a man and be the third.
you take my contact solution?
drank it last night then filled it with brandy for the plane ride.
Henceforth: booty calls will now be referred to as "deliveries of anatomy". That is all.
I bought a vibrating wall dildo with my tax return. You?
Idk I'm sorry it's weird to ask for testimonials on your penis
i wasnt sure i had a crush on her until i woke up this morning and saw i had googled fifteen variations of "lesbian marriage in estonia". where the fuck is estonia
But seriously, I love having sex with you and simultaneously know I never wanna date you.
Its 6:30pm and dad just drunk called me asking me what the alarm code at home is..... I'm at home, and dad isn't here.....
Randomize
