I created a new tequila drink. it is a mix of excitement and fear instilled in innocent people.
youre talking to a girl on facebook chat right now and im sitting behind her in class lol. creepy?
I wish i could sleep and get drunk at the same time...those are my 2 biggest needs right now
I feel like I'm in a bed a bagels and mistakes.
The entire defensive line took care if me when I passed out. One of them even held my hair when I puked and the other carried me upstairs to bed. God I love football so much more now
P.S. The slutty NASCAR driver costume will be saved and used year round for role play.
its the kind of night you break several limbs and say you were lucky
I don't listen when you talk. I just try to find new creative ways to get you to send me naked pictures.
Some nice lady just gave me a beer out of her purse. I love youth hockey
I told my mom I'm great in bed. That is quality mother daughter bonding.
How old am I that I had to sneak a boy out of my room this morning...
Many a woman has been in tears over the passing of my penis' whorish ways.
Lunch?
Massage?
Spanking with handcuffs?
oh, he’s out of jail btw. as of about 6pm. one of his customers bonded him out apparently lol
Like he really got a coke fiend to bond him out?
You got up in the middle of a sentence, puked, came out and poured another glass of wine and continued your story.
Randomize
