i found a dude playing guitar on the portapotty
20 yrs from now I just want to barge in her house and yell at her kids, "I took ur moms virginity!"
Good cause the way I see it, we are down to DAYS left of college so we should have as much naked fun as possible. And Jenga really facilitates that.
Let's learn from last year: Leave the handcuffs at home on St Patrick's Day.
It's been over a year since we've been get-so-drunk-you-throw-beer-cans-at-fat-girls-drunk together. That needs to change.
She bent over while grinding on me on the dance floor and her thong straps were hanging out, I thought it was a good idea to grab the straps with both hands and pretend to be riding in Santa's sleigh...not my brightest moment.
Colombian exchange intern from my Mom's friend's ranch loves me, and is staying the night because we got each other drunk. Successful Christmas? I think yes.
Before he left he told me if his girlfriend ever finds out, she'll take us both to an alley and kill us.
I woke up naked in this guys bed and the first thing I start saying is it's super bowl Sunday like I was yelling
Also, for real, though? Did we even have sex or were we just jumping on the bed drunk and naked...because with me that's actually a possibility.
I've been rehabbing my soul with cheese and wine lately
he told me he didn't like my name so he was going to call me Casey instead
Bro I just got a hand job playing tiny wings.. Hell yea
and i thought it was paint or jizz but it was cheese
please tell me you didnt taste test that
We went to the midnight donut shop and you hopped the counter and told everyone to "Get the Fuck out of your Bar" but to also "Make yourselves at home".
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