He ignores my calls like im some kind of stalker chick
Ive only called 5 times
Don't put random dicks in your mouth or any other crevice for that matter... and i'm home in 30 seconds
Wish I got that text last night instead of this morning.
To make up for the snow days we missed he's making us write a paper on alcoholism. It's like he knows.
other girls like to lick balls but none of them live for it like u do
Hes flirting with her via the sauce packets at taco bell....... I have no words
You fought the bouncer and lost, then challenged a hobo to a 40 chugging contest and lost. Sobriety is a good life choice.
she cried into her fur with two handfuls of money- she was the physical manifestation of white girl problems
No clues in my phone. Only dialed call: my own social security number. And that was before 10:00pm.
When I said 'i love my boyfriend' I didn't mean 'send me a picture of your penis'.
Honestly I think at this point I purposefully schedule nothing on Sundays anymore so I can spend all day wallowing in my shame.
He was rocking just a diaper, shoes, and a gun. Sadly, I would still hit it.
Yes... I'll kill two birds with one crazy ecstacy filled night.
Ya’ll! My debit card got switched with my boss’ at lunch today (both Red Wells Fargo)....I realized it at whole foods AFTER I ran it for $100 at Vanity Room getting my vaj waxed 🤦🏻♀️🤦🏻♀️🤦🏻♀️. Most awkward IOU ever tomorrow.
Last time I went to flagstaff I threw up in my beard. I would very much like to recreate that moment.
DO IT!
I have easymac and six pack of beer. This night can't get any better.
Randomize
