Dogs love guiness but it fucks up their kidneys
one more question, do you know why i woke up with 5 pounds of quarters, nickels and dimes in my pocket?
Maybe you should have studied instead of worrying about who is going to have sex with you
How many 'remember name' entries is it inappropriate to have in one's cell phone?
There's been so much talk around your vagina it's like a local celebrity
when i spit it made a heart shape. i think it's a sign
I know you're trying to keep the moaning to a minimum but the banging on the wall is totally giving you away
I want to celebrate with you...
There's nothing I'd like more than a celebratory "The guy I'm doing just found out he's not a baby daddy" dinner.
you really need to stop getting laid in my dreams more than i do.
I saw it and almost just was like "Ice breaker: your penis is massive" but I didn't.
You can laugh all you want but 99 grapes is a lot stronger than what you were drinking.
I'm so glad I was blacked out while I was going all exorcist in the bathroom. That's so not a memory I want.
Okay so how much boob would you consider inappropriate for smart casual?
I slept with the Australian in the bathroom of a gay bar. What has my life become.
Im wearing black today mourning the orgasm i couldn't get this morning :(
Randomize
