So you maybe wanna hang out again? I could use the $5
Whatever I can do to help stimulate the economy
My cousin just told me i smelled good. She must like the smell of cum.
whore
Look on the bright side, you can mark 'beastiality' off your bucket list
Ia nefed hefelkp i am a taxi
Bouncy castle Catalina wine-mixer race for the cure. It will be as fun as it sounds
so, does the "dick the size of your forearm" thing run in the family then?
Her life is filled with shit luck. Its like mother nature is having her period and just taking it out on her specifically.
Maybe if more guys knew my pillowtalk occasionally includes me scribbling notebook diagrams of cell signalling pathways, I'd get laid more often
He took the bartender's challenge and took a Jello shot with a tarantula frozen inside.
You know you're old when tea and a hot bath are more appealing than beer pong with lesbians.
I'm using the bullet from my cock ring to massage out my tmj lock jaw from giving too much head.
Currently eating Dominos at the bar high as shit so that's how homework is going
When you wear a dress that resembles the shape and color of Kirby to a wedding, you get the attention you deserve.
I put the area codes from ludacris' "area codes" into our expensive data visualization software at work, it's been a productive day
low point of the night : a cop just busted out laughing at me.
Randomize
