All these guys look like the American Apparel version of Jesus...
I just threw up a christmastime peep. I am literally already sick of the holidays.
By getting ready I mean putting baby powder in my hair and possibly changing my pajamas to another pair of pajamas
West Wing DVD drinking game: drink whenever they waqlk around a lot. I LOVE POLITICS SO MUCH
drunk me just left notes all around the apt to remind shitfaced me that i have mashed potatoes in the fridge. do not take them down if you come home before me.
I always know the weekend is over when the real license comes out and the fake goes back into the hiding spot.
He pulled his dick out during the Bourne Ultimatum, ruined it for me.
Ps, did you know if you google "drunk jenga", you're the first image that shows up?
Freshman ate returning to campus. Let Operation Slut Storm commence.
I have bruises everywhere. I think I took "the drinks are strong" as more of a challenge than a warning.
still not dressed at 5:00, jacking off watching men's figure skating and hoping my weird roommate doesn't walk in. anybody who says idk how to have fun is wrong
We were fucking in the boat on the lake when another boat saw us and honked their appreciation.
Everyone thinks it's an okay idea now until I'm overdoing it on the vodka/clubs, dancing on a table, trying to make out with the groom.
When I came out of the bathroom you were naked dead asleep on the couch but your dick was still rock hard standing straight up. I almost took a pic. It was impressive.
You know, normal sex stuff involves shitting your pants. If you do it right.
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