how convenient is it that the kid i'm fucking lives right next to planned parenthood?
There's a Sam Adams brew house. How were we not supposed to go
I cannot even. Taco bell reception. Beers. New friends from Georgia.
I know that was a dream because I woke up and there was no pizza
The hookers weren't a dream get tested
He told me about how he pissed his pants last weekend like it was a normal part of conversation. Within 10 minutes I was going home with him. I think he put me under some kind of spell.
Update... last night a man tried to bite my ear. I think he swallowed my pearl earring.
BURNT NIPPLES ARE UNHAPPY NIPPLES.
Yknow what, if there is a thug life for white bitches, I'm living it. I went out on a date, watched howls moving castle with my brother till he passed out, then went and got some a+ dick, and made it home in time to take my mom to work. Now its 7am, I'm in bed with some free tacos, and when I'm done eating I'm going to sleep. What a great night.
I have a boner in one of my pics with her which no one noticed.
Dude, i just watched a drag queen dropkick a motherfucker. this is a good night.
Blowing lines in the bathroom and trying to get into the mindset of someone who wants to be at work for 12 hours
gin. gin. Gin. GIN GIN GINGINFFdJH
I stole $10 from the guy I hooked up with last night.Not sure why but it was definitely more satisfying.
I CAN'T FALL IN LOVE WITH SOMEONE WHO HAS A LISP. I JUST CAN'T.
I might be a bit longer... I found a hot guy at the grocery store, so I'm following him and buying stuff that he's buying
Randomize