i feel like i'm waiting in line to date brett michaels
He's 11. You dont draw dicks on 11 year olds, i dont care if he ate your lasagna
i think he saw me take a picture of his dick
Chelsea passed out in the kiddie pool. Just added around 28 boxes of jello powder. Will let you know how it works out
She wont be able to take it all. I'll use a shoe horn to get it in if I have to.
You do realize how pathetic it is when the woman who does your bikini waxes has seen your vagina more than I have
I've been asked to reupholster their slam-couch so I found some off-cuts of medical-grade, hermetically sealed fabric. She'll be slammed upon for generations to come.
Sadly, she's the porn star that got away
Is he the circus guy or the bi-curious street preacher?
Hey are you going to the pride parade? If so get me a shit ton of condoms
Just saw the bridesmaid use her new sister in law as a stripper pole
Thanks for duct tapping my dick to my leg while I was passed out. I could only aim straight down. I stood on your bed. Have a nice day at work!
Getting so old my power naps are turning into, "can I reasonably just go to bed at this time?"
Yes we can sext. I'm taking my socks off.
Can you explain the Transformers set up for battle in my living room?
Randomize
