Dude, just walked by a homeless guy pissing on the sidewalk while he was screaming at his wang. God, I love this city.
My mom just got knocked over by a rollerblader. I'm trying not to laugh, bc my family looks pretty concerned
Eww. Jon Gosselin got both his ears pierced.
He looks like a bad one night stand.
There's a show on the Discovery Channel about T-Rex sex. I think this just made my life.
We always say that. And then its 4am and someone is screaming at strippers.
And then she banged "the first Italian rapper"
Minus the pink eye. Do I look fuckable tonight?
I'm glad I booty called you last night. It was nice to see you and talk, in between all the sex...
You could make a naked club. One member, you. One president, you.
the mexican frat downstairs started singing this mariachi song, then out of nowhere some dude busts out a trumpet and plays along. is this even real?
Get in your clown car, pick up everyone you know, and head to the park. drunk Sledding grand prix tonight. winner takes home the leftover beer
Nick is about to bring home a woman who is 39, a mother, and, by all accounts, FUCKING HOMELESS. Will update as details become available.
Hey, don't think you remember me but we met last night. I'm conducting a survey this morning its only one question: Have you seen Rob since 1am?
I'm just gonna start letting dudes eat it. American idol for my vagina
Donated a pint of blood at 6 and pub crawl started at 7. Thank your lucky stars I'm still alive today.
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