i don't have parental supervision. i'm gonna start accepting candy from strangers now.
Just gave my little brother the collection of clothes that boys have left in my room since I've been in college for his birthday.
And next time, don't pick a fight with me when you're naked. That's just not fair
I hate when people I sell to add me on Facebook. I'm your dealer, not your friend, C'mon people.
Do you think I could put your penis on reserve for tonight or tomorrow night?
see these eyes, they just want to bone and go to sleep.
He's so hot and there's so much R Kelly and vodka I think I might die.
so you know how I brush my teeth after I give you a bj? according to my dentist my teeth have never been cleaner. looks like this will be a recurring thing
That's how I like my men: traumatized and crying in a ball
I guess that means I was blowing a nerd last week.
And loving it.
Lexi was drunk enough at 2pm to say "fuck tom brady and fuck you too" to literally every person at the store in Pats attire.
Is it totally terrible that I just signed up for classes and already found the guy I'm going to bang??
I'm watching Part of Your World now and I'm crying and I feel like I'm floating right along with her. This. This right here is some drunken Disney Magic
I can guarantee he will smoke me out and I won't feel bad about it because he gets to touch my butt.
we found her on the beach half naked talking to a palm tree
Which half?
Randomize
