If I were trying to take advantage of you I would have maxed out all your credit cards by now.
just used a blowie as payment for him having to take the dog out to let her poop.
I got laid because I told her I play guitar. I haven't played in 7 years and only know a G chord. I love this place.
The last thing I remember was talking about the economic viability of cock ring manufacturing... we had some good ideas
maybe you should do the old hyperventilate, take a shot of vodka, sniff someone's hair trick
It's like salsa. But with balls in it. I like to call it balsa
be ready to rage tomorrow. like naked ranch dressing rage
There is a large scratch and bruise about the size of a pizza bagel next to my vagina. Please text back if you know what happened.
I'm laying in my house looking at chocolate pudding drip from the ceiling onto my partially erect penis... Yay for shrooms!
So feel off my bed lastnight into the trashcan. On the plus side i thought under my bed was a cave and i went exsploring
Could you imagine living in a city where bartenders are available by 1:30 AM
I'd have like 4 kids by now and at least one std
I'm just gonna eat nachos and wine fruit forever.
I may or may not have just let Ash Ketchum capture my wild Pikachu in a parking lot.
What do you think would be the best way to remove a baby carrot from a vagina?
he told me I was hypnotizing him with my mouth so I guess I do give good head
Randomize
