i really wanted you to get laid last night and i didnt think you were going to. so i posted porn on your facebook.it made sense at 3am
Please, do not let 'babydaddy' catch on as your petname for me.
He said "I know I'm not gay. I fucked a guy once and didn't like it"
i told my boss i want to eat her tits. 90 percent sure i'm getting fired
Literally I thought my ears were pouring out blood. That high.
Beer and cheesecake and spinning in cirlcles why did you let me do this to myself
All you have to do is speak. Your voice reverberates strait to my vagina.
Looking through my moms phone and find a pic if a dick. Scarred for life.
I wonder how he feels knowing that he's the one who turned me gay
i'm covered in glitter and body paint WTF
We're showing the video later bring pizza
Listen I just pulled white girl hair out of my underwear. This has got to stop. I was wearing pants all night.
True strength comes from lack of pants
Literally just sitting around waiting for someone to come along and fuck my chakras back into alignment
He was laying on a lawn chair, fell off onto his stomach and asked, "where'd the stars go?" That high.
Actually I really wish that I was drinking so I could ask him for breakup sex and then later blame it on my alcoholic tendencies. Maybe tomorrow instead.
Randomize
