I have to decide between the hot young blond with no apparent gag reflex, and the brunette with a great ass and a trust fund.
I think condoms have that nasty latex smell to remind you in the morning of how gross you are.
And the cops told us we were all naked.
She's "scared" of blowjobs, so she just played with it for a while.
Sharon took in a random bleeding stranger drunker than her, named her Nicole, and is feeding her jello shots on the toilet
I never thought I would say the free bottle of grey goose was the problem but it was
I have to be home in time to watch my friend on that Lifetime show about having babies. And by friend, I mean the girl I had a lesbian experience with at a party 3 years ago.
You're not required to sleep with every guy that spends $10 on you.
My goal of the day is to not shit myself. That's it. Setting the bar real low
Yea dude. I'm gonna be the life of the party. THIS BITCH GETS DRUNK BY HERSELF
Slept with my first Irish dude before I even got off the plane. Dublin has no idea what I have in store for it.
But once you explained how to fill cupcakes with semen I realize you were harmless and right on my level.
He can kiss the multicultural 3 some goodbye
I just watched will sing pure imagination from willy wonka and then blow a banana
You think the guy at the speed wash knows he needs to scrub the vomit off the side of my car?
He knew.
Randomize
