A hot woman with candy. This is what heaven is filled with
I hope you never procreate. Philly is already the ugliest city in the country.
Facebook really needs to add a bikini picture profile tab for girls, it would really save me countless amounts of time!
Well. Nothing came of that. And to think I manscaped and dusted with gold bond.
He invited you over for Super Sexy Saturday and Cosmos... I'm pretty sure that's gay
Woke up chewing my pillow from a dream where I was scarfing Cajun pasta from TGI Friday's. That's a new level of fat, even for us
Some chick is drunk waving down a taxi with a slice of pizza.
It's a never ending cycle of men I've fucked knowing other men I've fucked. I need a new town.
Omg. I'm making you a chocolate and "herb" birthday cake and using joints for candles. I'm gunna need moms help with this!
I get a little bitchy. We all know that
We're making a scrapbook of dick pics, you want in or what?
are you fucking roseanne barr in there?
Buying a new bed right now. My options are limited because I need to be able to be tied to it.
I haven't even lived here for 24 hours yet, and I've already banged someone. My new hoe life is off to a great start.
I didn't mean that as an expression. I'm literally asking if you want to watch Netflix and do nothing.
Randomize
