How do 1 in 4 women misread a pregnancy test; how stupid are women?
6 other girls and I took an ice cream truck to the bar when we couldn't get a cab. Best birthday ever.
First I must say that I am disappointed to learn that you knowingly have trashy friends with whom you've not hooked me up.
you goin out tonight?
who is this.
your orgasm for tonight
I hit on her. So did Sarah. Neither of us got anywhere. I swear she's asexual. Like Switzerland.
I decided I was tough enough to wax my bikini area myself. Long story short, I'll be drunk when you get home
I don't care what you say, the fact that he's a drag queen with the same shoe size as me is reason enough to date him
For the sake of being nice I congratulated her and she replied with something along the lines of that I need to stay away from him and not touch him ever. I really wanted to be like "been there, done that" but my New Years resolution was to not start any cat fight over boys with small dicks before noon
At a point I was just cumming dust last night
I love the barter system - he got laid and I got him to bring me some ibuprofen. A win-win really.
she walked up to me at the bar, kissed me, andthen declared "I HAVEN'T SEEN YOU OR YOUR PENIS SINCE 2011."
I just got a text giving me an hour window for when my vibrator is gonna be delivered. If that's not awesome customer service, I don't know what is.
I have four things I would like to do over summer too... Problem is they're all roommates
So I decided to sleep with him for the first time in months so I can convince him it's his kid instead of the other guy
BRB. These cougars are squabbling over my junk and one of them is offering to pay my tuition
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