People are allowed to visit it's just they can't be from Germany and have to wear masks.
:O -> O: ... that's emoticon for "he threw up in my mouth while we were making out"
sober me hid the cigs from drunk me. sober me is a tricky bitch.
Isn't that the only thing she's good at? Complaining and blow jobs?
I may do that, fyi I'm even more sore than I was yesterday. It's like the ghost of your dick is still inside me.
If I die on my trip, you're my chosen person. Nightstand-vibrators. Computer-iphoto naked pictures. I hope you feel honored.
I can't believe I paid your booty call for a ride home in cake.
I'm wearing a cape at the laundromat. I really can't say shit
Dude. Going to the Theme park the day after the 4th of July was the worst idea I've ever had.
Well the term Party is used loosely in this situation. Since it will just be mom wine drunk and us eating chips with multiple dips.
At least your road beer policy is responsible. Well, relatively speaking.
Well if I can't snuggle you, I might as well snuggle a stranger's cat.
When he said he lived in a closet I thought he meant his room was really small or something... But he actually has a queen size mattress on the floor of his roomates walk-in closet.
at least he now gets to tell people how he once threw a party so epic that the next day they had to clean some girl's body paint off the ceiling
As a side note, can you ask the maintenance staff not to drag their balls on our stairwell handrails. Please.
Randomize
