i find it depressing how it takes me longer to find a good video compared to the actual jacking off process.
He ate me out and then left in a hurry and shouted "Sorry to dine and dash" as he left my house
You are writing your college essay comparing yourself to Lady Gaga, Vladimir Putin, and Dale Earnhardt Jr. and you are worried about the conclusion sounding cheesy?
it took you forty minutes to realize it was a gay bar.
Just picture a bunch of Abraham Lincolns having an orgy.
I'm going to have to start playing roller derby again so I can blame my sex-related bruises on that.
I didnt realize how badly my legs were scratched up from power-fucking him in the bushes until kate dumped a bottle of vodka on me. that shit burnedddd
Maybe I'll make your dreams come true and pee on you tomorrow.
My cell phone fell out of my shirt pocket while tying my shoe on an escalator....which was followed by me being accused of trying to sneak an upskirt photo and being violently shoved down the top of the escalator. How's YOUR day?
btw, whatever u do, dont try and take that towel away from her..i tried, it got ugly..she said some things im sure she regrets.
There's a girl in class eating a pumpkin pie. Like a whole pie straight from the pan with a fork.
This tequila is so bad I might cry. I won't Throw up but I might cry
This is worse than naked and afraid. This is drunk and confused.
Have you forgotten that this whole sexy cop role play started with a comment about my mom?
I got very very very high last night and bought a cotton candy machine on eBay
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