I was rubbing the clit just like wikipedia told me to.
We should write a comic book about the many adventures of your vagina. Maybe even give it a cape or something.
i wanted to go smoke pot, so i told my mom i was getting tutored. she asked what time i would be back, i told her learning doesn't have a curfew
It's official. Every single female in their late teens and early 20s get their fb statuses from a pool of cliched "quotes" which all say, without saying, "boys treat me like shit, I know they do, but one day I'll find 'the guy' who will treat me right no matter how psychotic I am." Vom.
He had in his status he loved beating off and tagged his wife. another reason facebook should be for college.
So at what point while he was throwing up on the girl next to him did you think "yeah, im going to hit that"
I take back everything I said about communal showers
if theres anything i pride myself on, its my ability to look homeless.
Just know that as we speak i am injecting vodka into gushers
The milf did the body paint, come to the bar
The fact that I took a nap during my midterm shows exactly how I handle being an adult
Dude you were sitting in front of me eating uncooked bow tie pasta...
That was the night I passed out and someone threw chicken at me. SORRY I wasn't available to cockblock you from that Hispanic dude.
Just had a med school interview with that doctor I fucked in college. He remembered. Asked if I still have my nipple rings. Overall, I think it went well.
Need advice bro. Which one should I take: the blonde devil crying in the corner or the brunette crawling on the floor acting like a dinosaur??
Randomize
