i wish i could "like" people's thoughts in real life like i can on facebook
you can....by speaking....
I swear my cock just shook it's head disapprovingly at me.
I would pay so much money for a video of you fucking a sheep
Update- I sold my hat to some drunk kid for 50 bucks. I used my earnings to buy beer on the way home. I realize to everyone else seeing me drinking on my balcony at 6am, I look like an alcoholic, but I'm thinking of it as a night cap
But is that really the name you want to scream out during climax?
I'm sorry I came to your house drunk and fed pizza to your dog.
If you're ever desperate for a guy's #, ask him to call your lost cell phone so you can find it. Some genius used that on me last night. FML
Wake your sexy ass up. It's donut time.
You should make us a hot pocket to split while I go throw up.
please come back they are interrogating me about masturbation
Woke up with a squirrel in my bed, how was your night?
Your drunk naked friend is roaming the living room. Started roaming my room. Please come retrieve him
Still fucking the ballerina?
She can put her legs behind her head.
Enough said
I would climb him like a jungle gym. Enthusiastically and creatively.
BRIAN AND ANTHONY SPOON FED MY BROTHER MACARONI AND CHEESE WHILE HE WAS FUCKING ZARA. THEY WENT TO HIGHFIVE HIM AND ZARA WAS LIKE "WOO!" AND HIGHFIVED THEM FIRST
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