Being 21 is my favorite hobby I'm really good at it
the recession has oofficially hit my standards.
Something in my vomit makes me think I shouldn't have had that slurpee
It smells like wine and fried chicken. Im confused and intrigued.
Arguably, the best part was cockblocking those squirrels.
apparently i was just sitting there with my shirt down holding my boobs saying "its ok. its all gonna be ok"
Just think about how many life skills I lack. Cooking... Driving... Sobriety...
I am at the point where deciding not to drink alone is worth a rocky music montage in and of itself.
You chanted SOFA PIZZA all night then we woke up to find about ten slices under the cushions where you were sleeping....
I'm glad I booty called you last night. It was nice to see you and talk, in between all the sex...
my one night stand just gave me money "to buy a better vibrator" tis the season
She's sent me the same nudes using the same gestures and positions... It's like she has a template for her sluty-ness
You better not fucking die before we have sex while you blow fire. I'm serious. Don't mess up my sexual bucket list.
Give it up bro. I’m not wearing pants or a bra and only an act of god could change that
i thought the time we went to a party with no shoes on was bad, how about the time you left with no pants on?
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