yeah i was sneaking up to her room and on the way i saw a picture of her and left
I was worried if he didn't show me his penis, he would kill himself
just upgraded from jello shots to jello bowls blacking out just got that much more delicious
i dont know what was worse.. snorting the wasabi or puking on the neighbors dog
I hope you realize, I'm counting on you as my wingman next semester. It's your turn to advertise another man's penis. I did my tour all freshman year.
Ps, did you know if you google "drunk jenga", you're the first image that shows up?
So is there some kind of punch card you and I get to use every time we fuck a chick with a cast?
Last time he went to Europe, every time he started drinking he would wake up in a different country with no memory. There is no way he can be tour leader.
In the bath trying to absorb water through my skin because I can't drink it.. That hungover
I'm trying to get fucked by 4 girls here, and you're worried about verb tenses?!
I have to call my new boss to accept the job offer so you have pack the bowl while I pretend I'm a responsible adult THEN we can get high
Literally, and I mean LITERALLY as in "not to be confused with a casual hyperbole", LITERALLY the day we broke up she slept with 3 different guys that night.
1) It's nice to see that the whole "English Major" thing is upping the quality of your rants 2) Have you considered that your dick was the cork holding her sluttiness in?
You just had sex during the movie Radio. This is an all time low
... and this time i WILL NOT make out with anyone dressed as batman.
all i remember is arguing with the chick that yahoo was better than google
all you were doing was yelling YAHOOOOO in her face
so i won
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