Your dick is once again the conversation topic.
Joey just asked me if I ever got anything stuck in my vag.
was it embarrassing when you had to say yes?
This is the prime rib incident all over again
please tell me you didn't have sex with him in the bathroom...
Does an alley count?
I just couldn't help myself when there was a FOUNTAIN OF SHOTS
I found his backpack for the weekend. All it had was ping pong balls, mardi gras beads, and Tums.
Fuck you. You would only tell me how to get to your house in Spanish.
I feel I should make it clear.....I'm not stalking you, I'm stalking ur dick. You don't even need to talk when you get here. At 4am I think we'd both prefer that anyway.
Nothing like cleaning dried puke off your floor to make you feel like you've failed as an adult.
do you know how ratchet you have to be to get kicked out of a drag club on Halloween weekend??
Hey! Welcome back! How was the bachelorette in Vegas?
A safari of penis I hurt to the core
Free stuff before I even put his balls in my mouth like wow great start
Just for the record, I did not have sex in your bed. Happy 4th of July.
I drank a fishbowl of liquor and next thing I know I'm sliding into Zach Galifinakis' DMs
She calls him the walking dildo to his face. That relationship is already fucked up.
Randomize
