never play flip cup with pint glasses
hapi new year, hope this year brings u happiness and lots of sexi people ;)
stop writing like that.
Do the low cut shirt test. If he stares at your tits even in front of your brother, he's down.
It's offcial there's a Bobby Light radio station on pandora.
THEY WONT LEYT ME IN AND I REALLY NEED SOME FRUIT
Nothing like buying a handle and a 36 pack with a baby strapped on.
got delayed, meet you at the bar soon, found a shopping cart, i am now getting pushed to the bar by some guy that was peeing in the alley i found the cart in
I knew things were bad when I walked in on you feeding juice to your iPhone
All I've had today is a brownie and a shot of Jack, so you know. I'm doing ok.
That man gives me hope. I can't help it. And by "hope" I mean "wood."
I just want to be covered in whipped cream and spanked, is that too much to ask?
Hahahaha .. If it makes you feel better I had a sex dream about a cheeseburger last night so I feel like we both lose.
I have a hickey in my new work ID photo.....
If you fucking touch my phone and text people, drunk or sober, ever again, i will shove a swizle stick up your pee hole.
imagine the bill from school house rock beating the shit outta you
Randomize
