then they high fived as they party boyed me. I was a policewoman sandwhich. I love you halloween.
So you know that marine I slept with, well his girlfriend just told me I was pretty, I almost feel bad for sleeping with him now...
Dont! You were just serving you country
just found $310, wrapped in a rubber band, at the bottom of my sock drawer with a note attached stating, "Make it rain".
The polaroid of me taking a test-tube of Jegar out of the gay guys mouth pretty much explains my trip to Spain.
Of course... Double fistin nati light cuz the powers out and it cuts down the times i gotta open the fridge... Genius
officially hit rock bottom.. been yelling through the vent in my room to my little brother trying to convince him to get me water for the past two hours. i fear feeling the full effect of my hangover if i stand.
I'm at about main and main street
We found her on the doorstep. Just layin down going, "I made it home!! Aren't you proud??!"
I've somehow found myself in an emotionally abusive relationship with a married man who gives me drugs.
My life is quickly turning into a Lifetime movie.
He's the only guy without a tacky accent I've seen in this southern dump in 6 months. Bangage was inevitable.
You're such a Yankee.
It just so happens all of their names are Ryan, so I never have to change whose name I moan.
sometimes you just have to listen to beyonce and cry. that's how life works
my lips are numb and my face feels like a pool. PENGUINSSSSSS
Share, now.
If you can throw 105 mph it’s mandatory that you’re hung.
My co-worker accidentally texted me regarding the threesome him and other one are planning.
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