okay I may or may not have wrapped my body pillow up in your t-shirt and sprayed it with your axe and am now spooning with it.
again? I'm starting to get a little creeped out now.
its a long story involving jim bean, an owl, and a knife
I just got while a charlie horse while orgasming...most confusing feeling ever...
Ok see being that I'm not present or participating your vague texts "neeeeed that" and "vagina" leave a lot to question.
I rarely go in there. Unless it's for mini cadbury eggs and whiskey.
Going out so taking the 2nd 1/2 of beer w/ me ont'tube in a Pringles tube. I give money to people on the street that have more self respect.
I just ate a dove chocolate and the wrapper said "chocolate: always your valentine" WHAT KIND OF JACKASS WRITES THESE AND WHY MUST THEY MOCK ME?
Just thought i'd let you guys know that my dad was roofied at a lesbian bar last night...
It's not socially acceptable to be drunk in adult world. That fact makes me die a little inside.
Apparently I was proudly showing him the cup I barfed pizza rolls into
All I see when I think of you are dancing penis angels around your head.
It wasn't your birthday, you weren't supposed to be the drunk one
When people keep buying you drinks at the bar because they like you, you can't say no to them
Walking towards a police car with full spotlights on you while being fully erect..awkward exp. for both parties
Oh, don't mind me, that's just my vagina rattling.
I can't believe there are people our age getting engaged and I can't even find a solid coke dealer.
Randomize
