they had a keg party to fund her abortion.
He's paying me $45 to clean his room and $55 if i find the oxy that he lost.
i said good morning to each one of his abs personally
we just bought Vicodin from the Chinese delivery guy, this day just keeps getting better.
apologized to him about 10 times for being drunk. told him about 15 times that he was "really pretty"
I think I wrote "thanks for the free alcohol!!!" in their wedding guest book and I'm almost positive I signed my name
I was going to text him and apologize but I didn't want him to think that meant I approved of him being my niece's booty call.
Being thankful with your family is one thing. Being thankful with your friends while getting drunk and smoking bowls while eating leftovers, priceless.
She was touching herself and looking a shoes online. My debt is bad enough without bringing that hot mess into my life.
I mean there is a rehab there so its gotta be a good time
Anyhow, I am sorry for being obnoxious about wanting more sex and forcing you to eat lunchmeat off of my ginormous nipples. I knew that you weren't going to succumb to my pushy demands
He has a bed frame and a headboard.... That match his dresser and nightstand...
Hahah. That's good.
I feel like you don't understand the severity with which this weirds me out...
If I could run through a field of Reece's and Oreos, dive off a milkfall into a bowl of cereal. My Life would complete.
yeah....try hearing them in person. it sounds like two muppets going at it
Shhh embrace your inner whore. Just embrace it.
Randomize
