I miss having pregnancy scares ....at least i knew i was having a good time
there was a party in your bed and you weren't invited... change your sheets
Being drunk at the hospital is better than i expected. I got to hide and play in the little kids waiting area. Btw no one is hurt
Breathalizer & tazer party did not go as casually as expected.
On a scale of 1-10 how seriously are we considering being sugar babies?
I'm about a 7.95
i think you may have a shot to cock block in a moment. just saying.
Wake up an cock block please bc these are noises i dont ever want to hear again
It was one of those nights where you get back from the bar and end up staying up till 3AM beating off to facebook photos of girls from college
Well, I made it thru a doorway, so I think things are going good.
If you hear a sad honk in the wind it is me.
Well I'm going to San Francisco next weekend for pride. I'm sure I'll end up drunk and on a beach at some point.
I touched the butt once. 'Twas an experience with the greatness of legend. So I touched it once more.
Here when you come to your senses come back here and I'll fuck you back out of them.
I'm always down for nudity.
my downstairs neighbor came by to say he’s having a huge loud party tomorrow, handed me a toblerone bar, and said thank you in advance for your understanding
You should not be involved with someone who smells like that. Because that smell seriously does not go away. Even if you can't actually smell it at any given point, it will still haunt you
Randomize
