dude if Megan calls say you Sis was house sitting for me yesterday , she f'n found dana's panties
OMG THIS GUYS LICENSE PLATE IS GETTNHRWET
omg kevin jonas gave his bride a glass slipper..could he be any gayer then he is now
he is so gay. he makes clay aiken look straight. what is wrong with the lady that married him? kevin must be envious of her balls
My dad just knocked on my door and told me that my vibrator was too loud
gave him road head on the way to his grandparents house. purposely didn't let him finish, the sexual tension over turkey was indescribable.
All I've done this weekend is cum and drink. I think it's safe to say I'm dehydrated.
She deserves a chance to suck my penis. This is America. Its her God given right.
Have you ever just like not slept in so long that everything looks like a lava lamp?
My parents are paying for my knee surgery for my birthday. What costume will look good on crutches for my Halloween Birthday?
Welcome to adulthood.
It's ok, it's locked within patented Sealrite technology. That puke is staying fresh
What're you gonna do with the rest of your night?
Probably watching cooking videos and fantasizing about pie
I'm so glad you haven't fallen off any more yachts
I was having a serious heart-to-heart, and then the weed gummy kicked in.
Hey, thanks for helping me this morning
Always a pleasure to feed you bread as your body lay crumpled on the floor.
Y'all let us switch shirts in the middle of 200 people....why did you let me get this drunk by noon?
Randomize
