hook me up with the drugs dog keep up the good work
At least we don't have one night stands
True that. We sink our claws in our men.
I walked in on him shirtless licking the mirror while talking to his reflection. So yes, I definitely want to do shrooms the next time you get them.
You hooked up with 4 random girls, avoided your grilfriend finding out about it, and dodged traffic on Park Ave. Can you say luck of the Irish?
You left your underwear here. I'm hanging it on my door
You were laying in bed whispering and crying to the half eaten burrito saying "why am I shitting so much" and "what did I do to deserve this"
Dude she's on meds. He has a ginormous penis. Ur A dumbass. That concludes our feelings chat. Dim Sumday?
it would be a downgrade if your vagina tasted like skittles
It's been over a year since we've been get-so-drunk-you-throw-beer-cans-at-fat-girls-drunk together. That needs to change.
That would make regret #10
He was more like the original regret
you're the one asking for my vibrator at 4 in the morning so reconsider your life
I have poison ivy on my dick
WHAT
I also slapped not one but two bananas on the ass, twerked in public, and I think I made out with someone
At this point, I wouldn't be surprised if he laughs at all of our attempts to keep him sober.
I didn't want to shower, so I shaved my legs in the pool . That drunk .
Randomize
