no but I have been chillin' like em' homeboys in the rainforest yo!
my mom asked me how i could steal on a clear conscious and i told her it was because when i was younger she let me watch alladin and he did it.
I just got hit by a car. I'm fine; I'll be to the bars in about 15
i know we're in college but you cant booty call me at 3 in the afternoon. i dont care how drunk you are.
It's not normal to lose a tooth eating a McDouble.
There was just way too much discussion about my penis at that party
doing a walk of shame covered in blue food coloring is only embarrassing if you make it embarrassing...actually no its embarrassing on all accounts
Def something wrong w taking plan b with your daughters juice box
You're an asshole. I don't want your dick as my background. I'll look like I have a thumb fetish.
Just picked up an ounce of keif and if it goes to waste before the world ends I'm gonna haunt the shit out of somebody when we all die.
Yeah when I texted her last night the only response I got was "stoned eating cobbler."
There's a stripper getting there at 10 though so hopefully I'm out before the stripper gets there. I don't have time to deal with a stripper.
Then, he ate me out while I watched Bo Burnham. Best. Night. Ever.
Two of the boys I banged while living in that house are about to move into it hahhaaha
Never. No amount of alcohol could convince my brain and eye sight that it is okay to fuck him. I'd rather fuck my cousin.
Randomize
