This cougar at my work just said "big breasts" referring to poultry... Still resulted in a boner.
the pizza man had no reaction when jackie and me opened the door naked, i guess he's used to that shit
dpoing straight shots of jhameson. boys are imp ressed. i apologize
I'm pretty sure God is rooting for me with this two gf thing
Don't worry. This time I'll get black out drunk so they'll just think it's an American thing.
Minus the pink eye. Do I look fuckable tonight?
Adderal just makes me love life. I want to do so much. I just can't stop thinking about all the wonderful opportunities we have and how lucky we are and I want to make a difference in the world. I just have to reign in my brain and convince it that changing the world starts with a college degree, which depends on studying for these finals.
There is a hole in her door about 2 inch in diameter. You may see me on YouPorn
do you want me to tag you in the pics from the party?
Hmm. Use your judgment. Bootlicking pics are probably not ok. Otherwise fine.
The only times girls talk to me at clubs is when they're asking if I'm okay when I'm puking outside. Or if it's a tranny
So like, boobs.
are you really going to start every conversation like that?
This is the beginning of the end. Testicle Tuesdays and free ball Friday are going to scar people for life
Dude that picute of your balls will haunt my nightmares
In other news, I had my first sex related injury of the school year so that's cool
He got up in the middle of the show and returned with this massive ham shank, then offered me some by asking "wanna suckle on my hog." Should I be offended?
Your sister just admitted to being a " much bigger bitch" than you. So you've got that going for you, which is nice.
Randomize
