my house keeper must think I'm a prostitute.
just saw a girl throwing up in a taco bell nacho cantainor going 60 down the highway
He turned me down because he was still doing his taxes.
I'd be a gr8 surrogate. I'm gonna love your fetus
Awkward family moment #1: walked in on my 15 yr old nephew packing a bowl. Nephew says- "lets not ruin christmas and keep this our little secret"
a pansexual with facepaint started fucking a tall black girl on the bed i was sitting on so im going to mcdonalds
Just had Jager bombs for breakfast with her roommate... I do not regret this newfound lesbianism.
Not only did my parents pick me up from his hotel room in the morning, but he also came outside and had a casual little chat with my dad through the driver's side windrow.
I think my penis runs off weed. I haven't smoked it 3 days and I have no sex drive what so ever
Was the picture of her twerking on a fake plant sufficient?
There's nothing like when u really click with a stripper
I just bought six bottles of the 2 dollar vodka. oh yes there will be blood
"WHAT IS THIS LESBIAN MADNESS"
I will give him this, every time we go to the club he gets a stripper's actual number.
The Adderall says yes, but my body says no.
Randomize
