Having a conversation over beer pong about a threesome I participated in...it's only Wednesday
Another weekend, another 3 guys I have to awkwardly avoid while crossing campus...
Wow, So this kid just walked into class, yak'd on his lab partner then runs out. Class is now cancelled. I gotta find this kid and Thank him.
Ok, so for future reference, in Rome, "piano bar" means "brothel".
You sucked the drug dealers dick for a 20 of coke...?
Nooo, I payed for that. I sucked his dick because I had an urge.
I dont know, my roommate got arrested but I'm gunna get some tacos no matter what
We should install the 'help i've fallen and can't get up' buttons on our bodies for this weekend. Birthday weekend calls for extra measures.
It wasn't so much skinny dipping. It more like skinny walking...through a fountain.
I was high last night eating a fudge bar and making eggs with toast and corned beef hash for a 2 am snack and my dad asked what I was and the only reply I could think of was "I'm an adult."
Drinking and pointing where stuff needs to go is hard stuff.
Apparently I yelled "Spring Break 1984" at a drunk couple fighting on the side of the road.
You had a fry stuck to your face... Every five mins you would wake up, take a bite, put it back then fall asleep again...
I declared today 'Have a Bloody Mary Naked Day'. Why? Because I'm hungover, thirsty & don't want to bother putting on clothes.
It was crazy man, at one point after already going 3 rounds I tried to breakaway for a smoke...she yanked me by the nipple hair back on top of her.
Get over here asap there are three naked girls two bottles of whiskey and only one of me
Randomize
