he told my vagina that he was looking forward to meet it
I can't ever handle being "that girl" again. At least not until next semester.
Who has a video camera? i want to look back on this one day and say OH thats why i spent 2 years in jail
Listen, what he fails to understand is that the Olive Garden does not equal pussy.
I'm drinking rum and coke straight from the 2 liter bottle.
No need to call an exterminator, the ants overdosed on the leftover lines on the counter.
my mom went out and bought me new sheets and redecorated my room. its like she's more excited for me to get laid tomorrow for the first time in two months than I am.
My new dealer is 16. I have been getting high longer than he has been alive.
I don't see the problem
I just heard a 350 lb guy with a stutter describe getting blood in his eye as he was shanking his cellmate and, more generally, how to survive as a white guy in jail.\n\nYou should really consider going to some AA meetings
Is there a special protocol when the stripper has a Boba Fett tattoo?
TGIFridays...stall number 1...drunk...send help
She has dubbed herself the Pied Piper of Penis and keeps yelling about getting Cocktober started... Will send pix soon
Tent sex on an air mattress requires balance and flexibility. Not for the faint of heart
His condition for us having sex was that I wore my show boots. #equestrianproblems
he told me his feelings for me AFTER sex, so that means he meant it right?
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