I just know... :) goodntight
Whoops, meant "goodnight", but the other is true too.
let me put it this way. im never saying "join in or get out" again unless i know whos in the room.
Margaritas are 250 calories. Now measuring all food in margaritas
Totally using formspring as an incognito way of making sure that girl from last night wasn't jailbait.
She went home with him because he works at Jimmy John's and his car "smelled like meat"
He went 'unicorn hunting' and lost a fight with a fence. That's how he ended up in the ER.
It would be like a dance party with a dick inside you. I think that's what Ke$ha wants for the world.
I'd say things got weird when I started doing lines of molly in the box.
The family next to you was not pleased
These people don't understand my stages of drunk
I think tonight's gonna be the night I wear a go pro while trippin on acid
Right when he asked me if I was on birth control my dad walked in. This is my fate.
The fact that you got a stranger guy to buy you a pizza off tinder makes me feel amazing
he called me his ex's name during sex then proceeded to cry while still in me
I can't believe it is only 1:30...I may have to stab myself with scissors for an excuse to go home...
You will be reminded everyday when you witness my majestic mustache.
Randomize
